THE attention seeking feminist was up with the birds this morning as her alarm clock woke her to Chaka Khan’s I’m Every Woman.

After rifling through her underwear drawer for a bra that wasn’t burnt to a crisp, she donned her most unflattering over shoulder boulder holder and a pair of mismatched kacks, just because she could.

She then brushed her underarm hair and left the hair on her head alone because she’s not that vain and hasn’t looked in a mirror in six months. She’s completely content in her appearance and believes looking pretty is a tool of the patriarchy to bring down women.

Feeling full of rage, the obnoxious blogger from Turf Lodge went to work dressed as Emelline Pankhurst complete with a hammer in her handbag to crack the skulls of any men she encountered along the route.

Instead of carrying out the work she’s actually paid to do, she logged into the Daily Mail website to down vote all the comments and then took a three hour smoke break where she lectured random passers-by on the ever present need to smash the glass ceiling.

Her female work colleague were not the slightest bit annoyed as it gave them a break from her incessant shite talking.